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Who is Oolon Colluphid?

A good question. Or at least, one that seems to be asked quite often, which is not necessarily the same thing. The name elicits either a nod and smile of recognition, or utter bewilderment (and mis-spelling).

Oolon Colluphid is:

This is the story of ‘The Hitch-Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’. Perhaps the most remarkable, certainly the most successful book, ever to come out of the great publishing corporations of Ursa Minor. More popular than ‘The Celestial Homecare Omnibus’, better selling than ‘Fifty-Three More Things To Do In Zero Gravity’, and more controversial than Oolon Colluphid’s trilogy of philosophical blockbusters: ‘Where God Went Wrong’, ‘Some More Of God's Greatest Mistakes’, and ‘Who Is This God Person Anyway?’.

Therefore, Oolon Colluphid is:

Therefore, this Oolon Colluphid is:

 

Oh, okay. This Oolon Colluphid is a less-than six-foot tall ape descendant who is proud of his ancestors and would invite them round to tea, if only they were not extinct. He is from a small place somewhere in the vicinity of Southampton, England (and not from Betelgeuse after all).

And someone is trying to drive a bypass through logic and reason. Oh, they'll wipe a couple of windows and charge you a fiver first, but they still want to knock down the results of the hundreds of years of rational inquiry known as science.

So Oolon is taking a stand. Or rather, a lie down, in front of the toy bulldozers they are using. I'm game. We'll see who rusts first.

 


© Oolon Colluphid 2006. The contents of this site may be freely used for educational purposes provided they are attributed - only so that Oolon himself is not accused of plagiarism!